Dance When You Can’t Dance

For when you can’t come to the sessions…

You can use Dance Medicine even if you cannot “dance” in the literal way on the dance floor. Dance meditation is a way of changing our brains, so that it supports our health. We create dance medicine every week, when we show up on the dance floor.

If you cannot (or think you cannot) come onto the studio dance floor to dance with the rest of us when you are sick... Not feeling well… incapacitated… feel isolated or if you cannot come to our practice because you have to take care of loved ones…(practical application in italics)

Step one is…

If you are lying in a hospital bed, at home, if you are in a chair… if you IMAGINE dancing, sensing the ground, breath, space and movement in your body exactly AS IF you were dancing, the brain registers this also as “dancing”. The muscles change their tone, neurons fire, neurotransmitters get released …. It all happens. And sometimes it is even better than the “real dancing” as you can imagine making huge jumps and somersaults that you could not do in reality. Some of you might know the technique of Feldenkrais, where imagining a movement is as important as doing it. So I want to encourage you to use your dance medicine at home or in the hospital as a meditation without outer movement. You can do this with music through headphones or without, that does not matter. (if you have headaches, the music might be too much) If you use music you can let the medicine of music help you. You can let the beat find you… and help you with your imagination. You can imagine your favorite dance partners... this becomes an inner dance meditation through your mind… which works on your body and your brain. And in addition to that, the time is much better used than lying there worrying or pitying ourselves when we are sick… (I know, as I have been there many times myself)

This works because at the core of us all there lives a dancer. This being is strong, fluid, alive, radiating and whole. It lives in the now, and lets its dance be informed by its body and breath. It responds to life with authenticity, ease, flow and presence. Dance is its medicine. This dancer lives at our core – no matter who we are, how we are or where we are.

You can also use this meditation to work up the courage to come back to the dance floor, if you have not danced for a while!

Step two: Acknowledging Feelings and Emotions

Sometimes when I am ill or cannot dance on the dance floor or exercise as I am used to, I have noticed that I tend to resent my body. I might feel betrayed by it, get angry with it or just have a lot of feelings about the situation in general. I need to acknowledge those feelings – yes! They are real and also need to be honored. When we honor our emotions, they can flow through us. Otherwise: what we resist, persists. Of course we all know that it is not our body’s fault that we don’t feel great at the moment. This is how life is… life gives us suffering sometimes… these are challenges that we as humans all have to face in one way or another. And…

Feelings and emotions are real for us at the moment.

Breathe into them, feel them, let them flow through you, draw them, move them ( if you can) sing them, write them….

Step three: Befriending the body again

There is a way to rewire our brains towards a more positive experience of the body, versus experiencing the body as an enemy or something that we cannot trust anymore.

The following meditation you can do at any time…

Start sensing your breath, how it flows into your nose, mouth, throat, chest, belly on your inhale and how it flows out again on the exhale.

Now start to remember those parts of your body that have given you joyful, fulfilling and playful experiences and sensations in the past:
for example: your mouth has given you the experience of tasting delicious food, your eyes of wonderful sunsets, flowers… the wonderful things you have been able to see in your life,… your ears… the great melodies and rhythms of the world… without those parts of your body… these experiences would have been missed…your skin… the sweet touch of a baby, or a lover next to your body… well, you are getting the idea…

The important thing here is that you ONLY go towards the pleasure. The pain will try to lure you back into it, but remember and sense ONLY the pleasurable things that you have experienced in your body. If pain persists in a system for a long time, the brain circuits will be wired for pain. It basically builds a nervous “highway” for pain. This meditation promotes active rewiring of the pain circuits in your brain through remembering pleasurable experiences. After practicing this meditation, you will find that you can experience pleasurable things again, and not only pain. (Rick Hanson, The Buddha’s Brain)

Step four: Move what you can

This you can do at home or at our weekly practice sessions.

Toes, fingers, tongue, eyes will do just fine… keep exploring your dance through the parts of you that can dance an outer dance. Let them speak to you….Let them affirm your aliveness. This is the real practice….. this is what we have been practicing for year after year on the dance floor, so that you can take it with you when you are off the dance floor. The dance never stops…. When you leave the studio… the divine dance floor is everywhere!

I remember my dances with a mixed group of people with some kind of serious physical handicap. One of my dance partners was a woman who could only move her eyes and some of her fingers to move her wheelchair. Our duets were either through dancing with her eye movements, or her wheel chair. The dances with her letting her eyes move were some of the most intimate duet dances I can remember – for her and myself.

Step five: Being with loved ones and friends, is healing!

Stay involved with the community if you can in any way!

During illness or recuperation, during times of strong symptoms or feelings ( being the one with the illness or their caretakers) some of us get quite isolated.

Pain is isolating, whether it is physical or psychological. If my head hurts I am coping with the physical pain as well as with the psychological angst behind it that it might never stop, that I cannot teach my class, I cannot pay my bills, I will lose my friends because I cannot participate in any of their activities….

Nobody can take away the physical pain from me or make it better directly. But if I reach out and choose to be in the presence of people who feel safe to me, then the psychological pain, which is attached to the physical pain, becomes soothed. The feeling of isolation does not add to the stress that we are experiencing anyway. Being together with others who we trust bring forth a whole waterfall of positive feeling hormones and neurotransmitters, which help us to recuperate faster and to stay connected. The latest brain science tells us that not only a stuffy nose is contagious, but also wellbeing. Social networks help us to become (and stay) healthy and happy!!! (Brain scientists Christakis & Fowler, Zeit, 4/19/2009)

In times of change or high intensity – and illness or caretaking of others who are ill, is one of those – we all need a greater support than just ourselves.

And yes, not everybody is open to being empathic with a challenged person all the time. We all have our lives to live. Therefore it is important to have a – what I call SOS-list – a list of people I can call or be with, when I am down and hurting. People that I know will not judge me for my fear, pain and struggles. Basically mature people who know and have experienced life consciously, who know that suffering exists and who can offer presence and compassion to us. People can only help and assist us, when they know that their help is needed and welcome. From my own experience of having a chronic condition causing extreme migraines and exhaustion connected with that, I know that during painful times, even the SOS list might not be something I can do, because I cannot do anything. Somebody else needs to reach out to me, as I am even too weak to make a connection. There we “need a little help from our friends” to check on us.

The condition of one affects everyone else!

I have also noticed in my own experience of my husband being ill with a now chronic heart condition for an extended time, that I – as the supporter and partner of a person with illness – started to get very conflicted around our relationship. As much as I was glad that John was still alive, I started to resent him, just because he was sick, because he was not there for me in the way that I have been used to… I was angry at his body, that it did not function the way I wanted it to. I was mad at his heart, that it was threatening him and our relationship. It was very difficult to keep my heart open to the person I love the most, in the face of fear that I could lose him at any time.

I, as a supporting person had to do a shift here. I had to recuperate and change as much as he did. I remember the day when I realized that I now had a new husband. The old one from before the heart procedure would never return. This illness and procedure had changed him forever. Our relationship had changed forever. And of course there was grief and anger about this. But after I had realized the whole situation I felt so happy. I had the opportunity to get to know my husband anew all over again…. What a gift. I am still in the process of learning to trust that he will still be there by the end of the day. And one day he might not…… That is just life.

But what I want to say with that is, that the illness of one person affects everybody in her/ his surrounding in different ways. Relationships change. Some will change and deepen – some fall off. And of course we always can use some more compassion for ourselves and others. In times of change or high intensity – and illness or caretaking of others is one of those – we all need a greater support than just ourselves.

Come back to our practice sessions, even if you cannot participate actively on the dance floor: you can always sit on the altar or on our chair row that we have especially put up for people who “run out of gas” during class….. and be a witness. If you witness empathically, if you let yourself be touched by what you see on the dance floor, your brain registers this as “dancing” too. It basically is not important if you dance yourself or if you witness with all of your attention – sensing your body, tracking your emotions and inner imagery. The brain goes through similar activation than if dancing yourself. You just don’t get the cardio workout. Being present at the practice will put your mind on something more supportive than if you are isolated at home. Here the community really is our resource!!!

If you cannot come to the regular practice, stay in touch through email or phone. The community cannot support you if we don’t know what is going on.

So keep dancing my dear dancing friends.

I am imagining you in absolute health, happiness and aliveness!